Fading Darkness
by ninjadevil2000
Summary: Ginny struggles with the aftermath of the events in CoS. Trigger warning for fairly graphic cutting/self-harm.


**Disclaimer: Harry Potter is not mine, nor are any of it's characters, places, etc. **

**Author's Note: So I love this idea so much. I was actually inspired by an Instagram post I saw about Ginny possibly having a dark side after the events of the Chamber of Secrets. **

**Trigger warning: Self-harm/cutting. It's fairly graphic and emotional so just be aware. :)**

**Written for the October IWSC Practice Round**

**School and Year: Durmstrang, Year 2 (both temporary)**

**Theme: House on the Haunted Hill - Ghosts and deception (detailed use of theme explained at the bottom)**

**Main Prompt: [Action] Dreaming**

**Additional Prompts: [Romantic pairing] Ginny Weasley and Luna Lovegood and [Emotion] Rage**

**Word count: 3351 (I know it's over and I'm sorry. But I promise I won't go over for the official rounds.)**

**Thank you so much to my mentor/friend, Headmistress Lun (lun27). I couldn't have done this without you. :)**

* * *

Ginny Weasley was packing for Hogwarts, looking around for books and quills stranded around her room, but she found herself nervous and wary of returning to the school. She had woken early that morning, peeling a sweat-soaked nightshirt from her body and jumping into a cold shower.

She'd been awake for a couple of hours now, and it was finally nearing breakfastime. She could hear the clinking of dishes and cutlery, and the smell of sizzling bacon floated upstairs. She threw a pair of socks haphazardly into her trunk before heading down the many steps.

"Morning, Ginny," her parents greeted as she entered the kitchen.

A while later, after the family had finished eating, the boys rushed upstairs to finish their own packing for they would be leaving that morning to stay at the Leaky Cauldron for a while before term began.

Ginny was the last one to finish eating and as she finished her last bit of toast, Molly asked her daughter if she would clear the dishes away.

"Sorry, Mum," Ginny said. "But I've got to finish packing."

"Ginny, we have a few hours before we leave. Can you at least help gather the plates?"

Ginny groaned. "I'm really tired, Mum," she said. A flame of anger rose within her as her mum opened her mouth, presumably to repeat the request.

But instead of asking her daughter to clean the dishes away, Molly smiled. "Of course, Ginny. Go upstairs and finish your packing. I'll do the dishes."

Ginny was taken aback, but she didn't want her mum to change her mind so she returned upstairs quickly.

Thinking about it later, Ginny couldn't explain why she had been so adamant and angry, but looking back, Ginny remembered one time when Fred and George had been playing Quidditch outside in the garden. Ginny had tried to convince them to let her play. They hadn't for a few minutes, being the teasing older brothers that they were, but after a moment, they had both seemed to forget about their objections and, without hesitation, had handed her a broom and let her play with them.

For a while, she merely assumed that it was just her family, doing things for her because she had just experienced a horrific event, but it was when she returned to Hogwarts that she suddenly realized what was happening.

About a week after the Opening Feast, Ginny, Luna, and Colin were studying in the library. Ginny was trying to focus on a Potions essay, glancing at the books spread in front of her for reference every now and then, but her mind was continuing to wander. Her eyes strayed outside through a nearby window and she heard the laughter of older students a few shelves away as she combed her fingers through her hair. Plus, what would it matter whether or not she knew how to calculate proper amounts of Runespoor eggs or Boomslang skin?

She sighed for the fourth time in ten minutes and Colin looked up at her. Luna was completely immersed in her own world, finishing off her Astronomy homework by doodling extra stars over the parchment, humming to herself.

"Ginny," Colin said. "C'mon, you can do this. It only needs to be eight inches long, and you've already got about three."

Ginny rolled her eyes. "What more is there to write about? I've already written about the proper calculations. What more is there to know about snake eggs and snake skin?"

Her tone was annoyed, irritation sparking, and Colin looked at her curiously.

"Gin," he said hesitantly. "You are happy to be back at Hogwarts, aren't you? I mean, I know what with everything that happened you —"

Ginny cut him off. "It's fine."

She saw a flicker of hurt cross Colin's face, and she quickly smiled in reassurance. "I'm alright, really," she said. "Sorry I snapped at you. Potions is just really hard for me to grasp."

Colin smiled back. "It's alright. And you can do it," he encouraged her. "Write about the effects of adding Runespoor eggs and Boomslang skin to potions. That'll fill up the parchment quickly."

Ginny nodded and turned back to her parchment and books. But after a moment, her concentration strayed again.

"Would you do it for me?" Ginny asked tentatively, glancing at Colin.

He looked over at her. "Sorry, Ginny, but I need to finish this Herbology essay," he said, smiling apologetically. He turned back to his work but not before Ginny spoke again.

"Oh, come on, Colin," she pleaded, and the girl suddenly felt a wave of annoyance pass through her, one she couldn't explain.

Colin shook his head absentmindedly.

"Colin!" Ginny begged once more. A flicker of rage was present in her tone, but it barely lasted a second before Ginny shrugged it aside.

Instead of refusing again, Colin looked up at her, his face changed, breaking out into a smile that seemed effortless. And indeed, the words that followed seemed effortless as well. "Of course, Ginny," Colin said. His voice sounded normal, but the sudden change in his demeanor startled Ginny. Luna had finished her Astronomy homework now and was glancing back and forth between her two friends, a look of curiosity on her face.

As Colin reached for Ginny's parchment, ready to begin working on it for her, Ginny pulled it out of his reach. "Colin?" Her voice was soft again, light and friendly.

Her voice seemed to trigger another change and suddenly, Colin blinked. "Sorry, Ginny, but I've got to do my own homework, and the essay shouldn't be too hard anyways."

He turned and looked back at his own essay, dipping his quill into the ink and starting to write again.

Ginny looked to Luna but immediately wished she hadn't, for Luna was watching her, grey eyes full of curiosity, suspicion, and wisdom far beyond her years, making Ginny feel almost exposed.

She quickly gathered up her books, almost tripping over her cloak in her haste. "I'll see you guys tomorrow," she said, hastening away through the bookshelves towards the door.

She returned to the Gryffindor Common Room and went straight upstairs to her dormitory, changing into some pajamas and climbing up the ladder into her bunk. She laid there in silence, relishing the fact that all her bunkmates were still awake and hadn't come to bed yet. It meant there wouldn't be a risk of anyone overhearing her frightened sobs. "What's the matter with me?" she wondered. She heard the door open and quickly tried to quiet her sobs, pretending to be asleep.

* * *

The next day, an exhausted Ginny went to her classes like normal, but she hardly spoke a word all day until after Charms class with the Ravenclaws in the afternoon.

As Professor Flitwick dismissed them and everyone stood up to leave, Luna grabbed Ginny's arm and held her back.

"Ginny, what's going on?" the girl asked. "You haven't spoken a word all day, and you didn't come to eat lunch with me like usual."

Ginny shook her head and smiled, though it was strained. "Nothing, Luna. I'm just tired, is all." She pulled her arm free of Luna's grasp and scampered from the classroom without another word.

She hurried upstairs to the Gryffindor Common Room and stayed there for the rest of the evening, her head leaning against a window pane, thoughts racing like wildfire. She watched the nearby trees rustle in the wind, the sounds of chatter and laughter drifting through her ears. Her hair was falling around her face, but she didn't even bother brushing it away. As the night grew darker, she realized that she had missed dinner and wondered if she might go downstairs and ask the house-elves for some biscuits, but she shrugged that notion aside after glancing at her watch.

She went up to the dormitory, making sure not to disturb her fellow bunkmates, and got into bed, curling in on herself. She didn't know what was happening. She didn't know what was wrong with her. She fell into a restless sleep where a nightmare was waiting for her.

She was standing in a bathroom, and as she looked around, hazy memories were recalled. The image of a black diary lying in water, the fear she had felt when the ghost of a girl had wailed with anger. Ginny shook her head, trying to dispel the images. A voice was calling to her. It sounded familiar, but she couldn't quite place it. For a moment, she thought it was Bill. She looked around for the voice, but the bathroom was empty and dark. Ginny pulled her robes tightly around her, fear creeping into her heart. She felt as though someone, or something, was watching her. She spun around once, twice, three times, anxiety growing stronger with every passing moment.

"Bill?" she called frantically. There was no answer, no sound, except for the echo of Ginny's call.

Then she heard the voice again. "Ginny," it called. It seemed to emanate from within the sinks in the middle of the bathroom. Ginny took a shaky step towards the sinks. Then another step. Then another, until she was right next to them. She stared into the grimy mirror above the sink, but instead of her red-haired, brown-eyed reflection staring back, a pale face with dark hair looked at her. Ginny felt her breath catch in her throat. The handsome, ghost-like face had glowing red, fire-like eyes and his mouth widened in a maniacal grin. "Come back to me, Ginny."

Ginny couldn't move. She was frozen. She could only stare back at the evil face.

It spoke again. "Ginny. Come back to me. You're a part of me now, and I'm a part of you." The red eyes blinked. The face of Tom Riddle flickered away. And so Ginny was left to stare at her own reflection, with her brown eyes now glowing with that same red fire.

And Ginny screamed.

* * *

Ginny awoke with a shriek, startled and terrified. Her hands were shaking uncontrollably, her eyes flooding with tears and her lips trembling. She climbed down the ladder of her bunk and passed by her bunkmates who, thank Merlin, were all still sleeping.

Stumbling down the stairs, tears blurring her vision, she made her way to the common room and over to the fire as the water started to fall from her eyes. What was happening? She was frightened. And she was angry. At herself, for hurting the people around her. At the world, for letting something like this happen to her and her friends. At Riddle, for putting her through all of this pain.

She pulled her wand out of her pocket, swallowing the tears away. What she was about to do was a complete secret. Nobody knew. Not Bill. Not her mother. Not even Luna. It was better that way, Ginny thought.

She tightened her grip on her wand and pulled the sleeve of her pajamas up, revealing multiple white dashes across her skin. And without thinking twice, she pressed the tip of her wand to her forearm, muttering, _"Diffindo."_

A small cut appeared just under her wand and few drops of blood protruded from the sliced skin. It was hard for Ginny to concentrate at all. Her mind was still swimming with images of that bathroom on the fifth floor, grimy mirrors, and fire-red eyes. But she did. And she cut. Again and again, several more times. Moving in a line down her forearm until her arm was splattered in pinkish-red stains.

She had never gone very deep. Only deep enough to draw blood. But now, her mind still reeling from the nightmares, her heart still pounding with fear, she couldn't help it. She tightened her grip on her wand once more and started again. Close to her wrist, muttering_ "Diffindo" _this time going deeper than she ever had before. It hurt, more than ever, but for only a moment, for then it was replaced by a sweet relief. The drops of blood sliding down her arm, falling onto the carpet, making her feel as though the evilness of Riddle, the evilness of Voldemort, was fading. She knew, deep down, she shouldn't be doing this. That it was dangerous and wrong. But wasn't it better to hurt herself then to hurt others? She continued moving her wand tip down, millimeter by millimeter, until she was almost finished with the second bout.

Then, as she moved her wand again, the tip covered in dried blood, a cry startled her from her trance.

"Ginny!"

The girl jumped. She looked up, quickly concealing her wand and her arm behind her back.

Luna was standing there in the archway of the Portrait Hole.

Ginny opened her mouth to speak, to come up with an excuse, but Luna beat her to it.

"What were you doing?" The blonde's normal airy expression had been replaced by one of fear and concern.

"N-Nothing," It was a feeble lie, she knew, and Luna knew it too. Ginny quickly searched for something else to say. "How — how did you get in?" she asked.

Luna rolled her eyes. "The Fat lady let me in; I can be very persuasive when I want, and I knew something was wrong." Luna hurried over to her friend, falling onto her knees as she tried to pull Ginny's arm out from behind her back.

Ginny tried to scramble away but Luna was stronger than she looked and grabbed Ginny's wrist, the one she had not been cutting.

"Ginny, I saw!" Luna begged. "I saw you cutting for a moment there before I said anything."

Ginny shook her head. "No, you didn't. I was just, um, just —"

"Stop," Luna cut her friend off. "I know you were cutting, now show me." Her voice was firm, yet still a thread of the soft tone remained.

Ginny sighed, her shoulders visibly slackening as her composure fell. Without warning, tears sprang into her eyes again and she stopped fighting Luna. Her arm fell limp and Luna pulled it into her own hands.

Without a word, Luna took out her own wand and waved it over Ginny's arm, muttering a healing spell over and over again until all that was left were faint white scars and a bit of dried blood.

"Why?" Luna asked, once she was finished. She pocketed her wand and waited for an answer, holding Ginny's hand tightly in her own.

"I was scared," Ginny began softly. "And angry."

"At what?" Luna prompted.

The redhead sniffed and wiped at her eyes. "At everything," she replied. "Myself, the world, Riddle . . . my family," she added softly.

Luna didn't speak. She just held Ginny's hand tightly, desperate to keep her friend from hurting herself anymore.

"And I just feel so lonely!" Ginny added. She pulled her hand out of Luna's and stood up. She began to pace, not caring at the moment whether or not she woke up the whole of Gryffindor Tower. "I mean, I know I've got you and Colin, but let's face it. You're the only two friends I have. Everyone avoids me because of what happened last year. Even my brothers ignore me. You know," she hiccuped, "before he started at Hogwarts, Ron and I used to be best friends. We were so close and we always hung out together, but then he came here and he started hanging out with Harry and Hermione all the time. And last year, I was so happy to be here and to be able to hang out with him again, but he didn't want to be with me anymore."

Ginny took a deep breath and returned to sit on the floor next to Luna. She stared into the firelight. "I think that's why I was so happy to meet _Tom_." She said the name in disgust. "He was so kind and comforting. I could tell him all about how lonely I was and how I didn't have friends and he was always so nice. I think that's why it hurt so much to finally realize something was wrong. To realize that he wasn't my friend." Ginny paused. "That's why I cut."

Silence fell between the two girls.

Luna was looking down at her own hands, and she hesitated before saying, "I think I understand a little bit of what you're going through."

Ginny's eyes hardened. "What do you know about it?" she spat, but she instantly regretted the words. Luna didn't deserve that. She opened her mouth to apologize but Luna spoke first.

"I know a lot about it," Luna said, her voice colder than Ginny had ever heard. She held out her own arm and Ginny looked at it. There, on the pale skin, were multiple small white scars, nearly identical to Ginny's.

Ginny looked up at her friend. "Luna, I — I'm so sorry."

Luna pulled her arm back. "I started cutting just a few days after my mum died. I thought it would make me feel better. I did it so often that I got sick one day. A couple of months after it happened, my dad found me in my room, passed out on my bed. That was when we started getting really close."

Ginny was quiet. She had had no idea that had happened to her best friend.

Luna spoke again. "Ginny, the reason I'm sharing this with you is not just because you're my friend, but because I want you to feel like you can share anything with me. Only two people know that I ever cut and that's you and my dad. I want you to know that you can tell me anything."

Ginny looked up from her lap, her terrified brown eyes looking into Luna's comforting grey ones. Luna was the only person in the world who knew the full extent of what had happened in the Chamber last year except for her family, Harry, and Hermione.

Ginny took a deep shaky breath. She couldn't keep it in any longer. It felt like the secrecy and the pain and the fear was killing her. And if she wasn't careful, it might one day end like that.

"There — there's a part of h-him inside m-me," Ginny managed. Her voice was soft and quivering. "I th-think I've kn-known for a while, b-but I've b-been trying to — to ignore it. I've been deceiving myself."

Luna nodded. "Go on," she prompted gently.

Ginny proceeded to explain everything, and when she felt as though her mind and body were drained, her voice hoarse from tears and anguish-filled stories, Ginny stopped talking. She didn't know what time it was, but not a single soul had stepped foot in the common room. Ginny and Luna were sitting together in front of the fire, their hands intertwined and Ginny's head leaning on Luna's shoulder.

"I'm so sorry you have to go through all of this, Ginny," Luna comforted. "But you need to remember something; you are not alone."

Ginny lifted her head.

"You are not alone," Luna repeated. "And you never will be. You'll always have me and your family. We care about you so much. Maybe we don't fully understand what you've gone through, but we love you and we'll take care of you."

Ginny nodded. "Thanks, Luna," she muttered. "That — that means a lot." She hesitated, then asked. "Do you think I should tell Colin?"

Luna shrugged. "That's up to you."

"How do you think he'd react?" Ginny said.

Luna sighed. "Well, would you tell him what happened the other day? When he almost wrote your essay for you?"

"I don't know," Ginny said. "Do you think I should?"

"That's up to you," Luna said again.

Ginny turned back to the fire, her eyes watching the orange flames flicker against the soot-blackened fireplace. A ray of dawning sunlight started to shine in through the windows, casting warmth over the pair. It was comforting, and deep down, Ginny now knew, she would be okay. She knew this piece of darkness inside her would probably never go away, but maybe, with time, it would fade.

* * *

**AN: So what did you guys think? I really hope you all liked it. Please feel free to leave a review. **

**Theme use: **

**Ghosts - the ghosts of Ginny's past**

**Deception - Ginny deceiving herself and others, though without knowing it.**


End file.
